This is a Mother's Day special and I had the very special pleasure of interviewing 7 extraordinary mothers as they shared with me some things about motherhood from wisdom to funny stories that I think you all will enjoy!
What does being a mother mean to you?
VALERIE:
At the risk of sounding a bit cliché, being a mother is one of the greatest honors God could have given to me. I'm being trusted to help train up a child and direct him to a path that will one day lead him to his destiny in Christ. When my sons were given to me, they had no preconceived notions on anything. Whatever I told them, they believed and their trust was in me. That is an honor. Because I helped raise men, the years I spent with them as they grew, allowed me the opportunity to mold some woman's husband, and I actually viewed it as such. I'm helping to raise some woman's husband, and God TRUSTED me to do it according to His Word. That's awesome! Being a mother allows you to give that really special and different kind of love. The kind of love that has no restraints and is unconditional. I LOVE THAT!
SHEILA:
My 38-year old daughter and 28-year old son are my heart. They have established home and families of their own but we are all connected, not in an overbearing way, but in a loving way. Motherhood can also be stressful if you let it, but I am at a good place in my life and very thankful for all phases of growing up with them that I have experienced. I've learned that they must follow their dreams. My role as a mother is to let the be themselves. Being a mother, I guide, I love, I show them by example, and I listen. Being a mother is a wonderful gift.
FERRINNIA:
Mother can be:
- Someone who PRAYS for her family
- Someone who nurtures
- Prefers her family before herself most of the time
- Sometimes she the (VOICE) for her children
- Role model
- She's the "Go Get Her Done"
- Go to person
- The multi-tasker
- Up early, down late
- Peace-maker
- Cheerleader, Motivator, Prime Example, Transparent, Advisor
- Can admit when she's wrong
- Most of all she's a mother first, then friend
SHARON:
Being a mother means that I have been given a gift an a responsibility to guide a life and to give that life back to GOD. I means loving someone, instantaneously, more that I love myself and knowing that you will love that person until the day you die.
KAULAH:
Having experiences and
responsibilities that include but not limited to:
- Being blessed by God with a
precious gift that will be cherish for a lifetime
- Another wonderful new beginning in my
journey through life,
- Perhaps one of the hardest, most rewarding
jobs I will ever experience
- Comforter, Protector, teacher, trainer and disciplinarian
- Being
able to multitask
- Being a confidant and friend
- Have a growing family
- Unconditional
endless love
- Being responsible for someone other than
yourself
- Generations of children
- Caring and sharing
- Encourager
- Having a place of honor – Exodus 20:12
And so much more...
*Looked
forward to being a grandmother, great grandmother or great great-grandmother
*Love I
have for my child is endless not only with words but with deeds.
CHELSEA:
Being a mother to me means being a lifelong teacher in every subject imaginable. Being a mother means loving and nurturing a child more than you could fathom. Being a mother means having the hardest 24/7 job with the best benefits in the world.
ZARINAHA:
Being a mother is the most profound experience I've ever had because motherhood takes what comes out of you (physical birthing) and then requires that you nourish and replenish it with what's in you (values, morals, etc). It is the most challenging yet rewarding gift because it takes and gives at the same time. It means that I have been graced with a responsibility to develop, rear, support and protect something of me, yet so much bigger than me.
What is an important lesson your children have taught you?
VALERIE:
That I don't have to be perfect. Making a mistake is okay, as long as I can say I'm sorry. The most important lesson though, was to remember what it was like for ME when I was that age. Being able to view in retrospect, allowed me to be more understanding in the present. I also learned it was important to be honest, real, and transparent.
SHEILA:
An important lesson my children have taught me, is that you have to show love unconditionally. No matter what your kids do. Also allow them to be adults and design their own lives without interfering... too much.
FERRINNIA:
Not all of her children are the same, no matter if they were reared in the same home or not. Each child has their own personality and characteristics, therefore it's the mother's role to develop her child right where they're at and not compare them one to another
SHARON:
My daughter has taught me not to be afraid to try new things and to keep moving forward. She has also taught me to be a better listener. She also taught me to not get too puffed up about my accomplishments and to be the best example I can be.
KAULAH:
Pray and trust the LORD
- Praying
and training up a child to love the LORD is essential. Learn what it meant to love unconditionally.
Realize I will make mistakes, ask for forgiveness, apologize, and continue on.
Patience is a virtue. How to be
responsible forgive, accept people for who they are, be silly, brave, share,
put some else’s needs before my own.
- Enjoy
them now while you can the empty nest comes much too soon.
- Accept
them for who they are not who you want them to be.
- Stay in
touch
CHELSEA:
One important lesson that my child has taught me is that everyone moves and grows at their on rate and to appreciate their growth rather than frustrate myself at where they are not.
ZARINAHA:
There are countless lessons I learn from my children daily, but if I had to choose one, I would say they have taught me the nature of God's love. My child can have a tantrum, receive a consequence, and moments later hug and kiss me like nothing happened--God's love. I can be having a challenging day and my daughter will ask me to read her a book or sit on the floor with her-- spend time. My attitude instantly changes--God's love. I find myself watching them and marveling at the nuances of their personalities, the ways they define their world with such simplicity, the ways they communicate without saying a word-- yet saying everything. They mirror God's love to me and my reflection changes.
What's something you did you not understand being a daughter, but you learned as a mother? (Something your mother taught you that you didn't fully understand until you had your own children?)
VALERIE:
There's really no answer I can write for this question, due to various areas of dysfunction. What I personally came to understand was the importance of simply BEING THERE. Being there consistently in EVERY capacity. I fully understood that.
FERRINNIA:
Growing up, I could not for the life of me understand why my mother was so overprotective of me. She wanted to know whose house you were going over and was the MOTHER going to be there? What's her phone number? She wanted to talk with her. I found myself raising my children the very same way......
SHARON:
My mother taught me that people are watching you even when you don't know they are. When you have children they are learning from you and watching you even when you don't know they are. They pick up on everything about you; good and bad.
KAULAH:
Your duty as a mother never
ends it is 24/7, there are times when you get up early and you stay up late.
Breaks/naps are useful.
They mimic what you say and
do, so teach good things. Don't force your child to grow up to soon allow them
to enjoy childhood.
CHELSEA:
I did not understand as a daughter why my mother was so strict and mean. I realized now that I am a mother, that as a mom, you just want to protect your child from everything and everyone that can harm them. I realized that my mother was only protecting me from unnecessary hurt and pain.
ZARINAHA:
My mother birthed three children, two- eleven months apart, and my brother and I are 14 months apart. Did you catch that? That meant she had two in diapers with one in training, three 'let me be me' middle schoolers demanding to be heard; three teenagers fighting for their independence, three in college awaiting care packages, and she did all of this as a single parent. Needless to say, I didn't understand much of anything that my mother did because she wasn't the typical mom. She had to get creative in her discipline, think twenty steps ahead of us, all while working full time. I can't fathom how she made it through the day without losing her mind. Until I became a mom. No matter what was going on in our lives-- the constant moving, mother daughter bouts, financial struggles-- she kept one thing constant- PRAYER! She would wake us up every morning, make us hold hands and pray. We now all live in different states, but till this day we come together on a weekly conference call to pray. My mother laid the greatest foundation for me in that she taught me how to commune with God. I am fully aware now that she endured because of it, was kept as a result of it, and transferred one of the greatest gifts to us-- an unwavering belief that God's got it!
What is the funniest moment you've had with one of your children?
VALERIE:
I've had many funny moments with all 3 of my sons, but my youngest son always has a recurring session of "Let's Roast Dad". Any time he talks about his father's mishaps, it's extreme laughter time. My son has an uncanny way to make you laugh at yourself. It's really hard to pinpoint any one particular occasion.
SHEILA:
My funniest moment I had with one of my children was when my son received a kitten for his birthday, and for about a year, he thought the cat was a male (Max), until one of his closest friends who raised cats, came and spent the weekend with him and told him that his cat was a female, I laughed so hard everytime I looked at the cat...After that I started calling her Maxie.
FERRINNIA:
Really one of the three of my children would probably say is when their mother got a speeding ticket and the State Trooper for Jackson Mississippi had to get on his PA system and ask me to pull over. At the time I did not realize I was going 90mph down the expressway. I even looked at him and asked, "Are you talking to me?" After he pulled me and two other white cars over for speeding, he told me I was leading the pack........
SHARON:
My daughter has always been good at doing hair. One time I allowed her to cut mine after I'd put a sew in. The cut was uneven and she kept trying to fix it until it was just a hacked up mess.
KAULAH:
It was
in a thrift store in Georgia, my granddaughter, daughter and I were browsing
around the store to see what items we might want to purchase, when I decided to
try on a blouse that needed to be pulled over my head. I didn't go in a
dressing room because I thought I could just slip in on over what I had
on. Well needless to say when I was
trying to pull the blouse down over my head and shoulders it got stuck because
to my surprise it was absolutely too small. When my daughters looked at me they
immediately broke out in uncontrollable laughter. I began to laugh as well. We could hardly draw a decent breath or keep
from bending over with tears streaming down our faces. Even though the laughter
was at my expense it was a memorable Kodak moment. Thank goodness cell phones with cameras were
not as popular at that time as they are today. No one captured that pose.
CHELSEA:
The funniest moment I have had is when I walked into my child's room when she was about 10 months old and she was hanging from the top bar of a bunk bed. Although it scared me she was enjoying swinging back and forth like a little monkey.
ZARINAHA:
Wow. You have to understand my personality to really get why this is funny. My children are 16 months apart. I live for the moments when they are operating from the same galaxy. That pretty much means, they nap at the same time, play pleasantly together, and give mommy limited surprises. This day the universe was on my side. I had mommy time in the morning, learning and play time went smoothly, nap time lasted over an hour, and I could feel myself breathing easy....(I need to insert a sound effect here, worthy of a foreshadowing that something dramatic was bound to happen.) We were preparing for bed. I had one in the bathtub and the other one patiently waiting her turn. I lifted my birthday suit boy out the tub and onto the changing table. As I began to apply lotion to his body, my daughter starts coughing. Between me asking if she's ok and monitoring my busybody who doesn't stay still at all, I hear a sound immerse from my daughter's throat. A familiar sound she makes when she's ingested something that contained one of her food allergies. The sound of violent puke belting from her gut. She begins running in circles puking everywhere. I know most moms would spring into action, but I'm the mom who is allergic to body fluids and would rather clean toilets than come in contact with regurgitated food particles. As I'm adjusting my mindset, I look down and my son is exchanging smiles for brown gooey goodness emerging from his bottom. Her screaming startles him and causes the room to fill with a harmonious cry with mommy standing in the middle trying to determine where my peace went. Needless to say, everyone made it bed smelling like disinfectant that night.
What is the funniest moment you've had with your own mother?
VALERIE:
The funniest moment was when we went to Quick Trip. I was waiting in my car while she went in to make a purchase. I was about 3 parking spots away from the door of the store, and there were two other cars in the parking lot that resembled mine. I literally watched my mom come out of the store and get into another vehicle. (she was reading something while walking). It probably would not have been so bad, except the person was in the driver's seat of the car. When she realized what she did wrong, she quickly apologized and explained to the driver, the importance of having their car doors locked. (For real?) We both laughed.
SHEILA:
The funniest moment I had with my mother was when I was asked out on my first date. Two gentlemen showed up at my door, one was tall, dark and handsome, and the other was tall light skinned, with sandy red hair, thick glasses, and freckles, my mother thought I was going out with the tall, dark handsome one, but it happened to be the opposite... I introduced him to her, after the introduction, she proceeded to the kitchen, and laughed as loud as she could, I'm pretty sure they could hear her laughing, because I did, so I went into the kitchen, to quell the laughter, but she was laughing so hard it made me laugh too...We had a good time with that one for a long time,
Ultimately, my date went well...To me, he wasn't ugly, just a little funny looking.
FERRINNIA:
My mother is saved, sanctified, and filled with the precious Holy Ghost. She loves to call us on our birthdays and sing the "Birthday Song" over the phone, but this particular year she was live and in person. It was her oldest grandson's birthday and she was ready to sing the "Birthday Song". Apparently, all this time she has put her own little personal touch to the song with a little movement and she demonstrated that to the family. We were not ready for that and she ended it with a Zumba move, WE WERE WEAK!!!!!! - so much so we could not breathe, we were laughing so hard.
SHARON:
After my mother had her heart attacks, I did the cooking. She was on a restricted diet which included no fried foods. One night I cooked the family fried fish and I grilled hers. All while I was cooking she sat in her room, just off the kitchen, telling me how good the fish smelled. I made a certain number of fish plus he grilled pieces. I left the kitchen for a minute and when I returned she had walked through the kitchen to the bathroom and was in there for a long time. I kept asking if she was alright and she'd mumble that she was. I started putting the food on the table and I noticed that one of the pieces of fried fish was gone. before I could investigate what happened, my mom comes out of the bathroom with the skeleton of the fish and a big smile. We laughed for five minutes.
KAULAH:
It was on a Saturday afternoon. I had just finished taking my mother on some errands she had wanted to run and we had made it back to her home and I was in the kitchen putting away groceries. All of a sudden I heard this laughter coming from her bedroom and I went to see what was so funny. She was sitting on the bed just having a good time. I ask her what was so funny. She said I left home without my bra! You would have to know my mother she would never intentionally do that, but in her haste to get ready and her not feeling well she forgot to put it on and did not realize she was out in public for hours without it. All I could do was shake my head and laugh with her.
CHELSEA:
One of the funniest moments I have had with my mother is playing hide and seek in the dark with my siblings. My mother was always known for scaring us and I remember being tickled until my stomach hurt.
ZARINAHA:
My mom keeps me laughing. She is that mom that all your friends love but when you were growing up you thought--please don't embarrass me. I remember my freshmen year of college, she traveled to North Carolina for homecoming weekend. I had a suite with about 6 roomies. I can't even recall what we were discussing, but all of a sudden my mother falls out on the floor, starts rolling in a ball across the room, hysterically laughing. I'm thinking, you have got to be kidding me mom; not the first meeting-- can you at least harbor your "crazy" for the end of the weekend. I look around the room and the girls are right there with her, bellying over in laughter, like she's their newly found friend. She's always had that affect on people.
Happy Mother's Day to all the MOTHERS out there! We celebrate you every day!
